A few months late, but still...

I don't really have anything important to say. School is sucking my lifeblood, Paris is springy, and so on and so forth. The ability of French academia to piss me off is an eternal mystery to me, but I've figured out that profs just don't care about the students. They yell at them and few are helpful, and not one is warm and welcoming. Oh, and they also randomly don't show up for class, without posting a note or sending out an email (oh, but since there's no collective email system for French universities, that would be too hard to do in the first place, so nevermind that). Anyways, this morning, when our professor committed this heinous crime against studentity, my friend and I bitched about it while enjoying giant crèmes in a café down the street. Crèmes are really one of the best things ever. Between that and air conditioning, I'm not really sure which one wins. We meant to get work done while waiting for our ass-raping of a translation exam at 2, but of course that didn't happen. Instead, we reminisced about TV shows and fights with friends, particularly one incident in which a friendship ended because of movie-going arrangements. And it got me thinking about things...

Well, I'm always thinking about things, but it reminded me of all the times I was not only a bitch (stop laughing, I know that's a lot), but a bitch for no reason. Or a horrible person for no reason. Or just those times when I should have kept my mouth shut or should have not done something I unfortunately did. And I really feel bad about all those little things. People may or may not have forgotten them by now, and the offended probably don't read this, but for them, and for everyone I've unfairly been a bitch to, please accept my apologies.
1. Cortney (even though there's no possible way she'll see this): I'm sorry for screwing up the "Secret buddies/sisters" game senior year of field hockey. I like to attribute it to my awkward phase, but I've since learned that it wasn't really so much a phase as my actual, permanent personality.
2. Ally: I'm sorry for being a heinous bitch all the time and starting shit when I shouldn't have. And I'm sorry for not being better with keeping in touch. And I'm really sorry for that one time I said that thing you specifically asked me not to, and during that huge "conflict resolution" type-thing, saying something else just as stupid. I think we were all a little on edge about stuff, but I really didn't mean any harm, and I'm sorry.
3. Nina: I'm sorry for taking the flower you caught at Medieval Times at my 11th birthday party and telling you my dog ate it (which, for those of you not involved, is a totally legitimate explanation for a missing flower). And I'm sorry for not mentioning that at all for the past twelve years. It's not a big deal, but I've felt horrible about it this whole time. You were so happy when you got that flower, and I had to be a selfish brat and take it.
4. Katherine: I am SO sorry about that ridiculous thing I wrote a couple of years ago when we were on JYA. I don't even know why I wrote it, but I think I was just looking for something to bitch about, and that coffee date happened to be the last thing that happened before I got home. I've also felt really horrible about this since it happened, because you are a cool girl and didn't deserve that kind of trash-talk, and I really do think that we could have been better friends had I not been so self-centered and gossiping. Also, I really envy your ability to wear dresses with belts (all asking-for-forgiveness aside, it's true).

It would have been convenient to post that at the beginning of the year, or wait until it becomes a step to recovery - let's hope it never comes to that - but I just wanted to get it off my chest now. I think it's going to be a rough summer, and I think I'd like to get a head start on letting go of some of my baggage. Figuratively, of course, because gym memberships here are 600 euros a year and there's no way I can fight the boulangerie temptation. There are some things you just can't ask a girl to do.

Now for some randomness: I really want this or this, and how cool would you be if you went walking amongst intelligentsia wearing this? (pictures below)


Pretty cool, huh? Nerdy, of course, but cool. If you didn't know what it actually was, you'd just think it was pretty, shiny, design-y jewelry. Because, well, that's what it is. Anyways, I'll just add it to my list of materialistic things I'd like but cannot have. Ugh. On the bright side, I think I found some place to go study that isn't the library or the café down the street with the ornery waitstaff! I'll elaborate later, as I should probably go visit before I confirm that hypothesis. That's all for now, folks. Back to the grindstone.

(TOTAL sidenote: I have no fucking idea what's going on upstairs, but it is either World War III or a massive orgy involving sqweegees. Also, I just heard my neighbor orgasm. Not the one upstairs; the one next door. Seriously, I'm starting to think I live in a brothel.)