À la française

The honeymoon is over, my friends. I have officially been engulfed in French culture and, subsequently, bureaucracy. Here is a list of my grievances so far:

-In order to get a cell phone (contracted), you have to have an ID, RIB (relève d'identité bancaire), and a verified check.
-To fully open a bank account - and therefore receive your bank card and checks, you must have your carte de séjour (visa), which, in my case, I will not have for at least two or three weeks from now.
-In order to get ANYTHING in this country, you need an RIB, which proves you have a bank account. This includes, but is not limited to: cell phones (contracted) and cartes imaginaires (metro pass for students under 26).
-Because my bank account isn't verified yet and I don't have a card, I can only take money out if I go to the actual teller, from TUESDAY TO FRIDAY, during normal business hours. When my cards and checks arrive, which I was just told would actually be next week, I have to go to a different branch to pick them up because that's where my account originally was.
-The people working in my building, including the landlord, keep forgetting to turn things back on. Nothing totally necessary to every day life or anything, just things like my water and the hall electricity. (So now when I come home at whenever o'clock, it will be pitch black. And I'll probably trip and break my nose or something, and then when I try to sue the landlord, he'll be all "stupid American, trying to sue me for her own clumsiness." Thanks, landlord. Who, by the way, NEVER introduced himself to me, even though I've seen him in passing multiple times and had a semi conversation with him! And has yet to fix the broken electrical socket! Ugh!)

Also, I blocked the phone that the girl who lived in my apartment last year left me by accident, and it will cost 25 euros to unblock it. But if I wait until I have a phone contract of my own, they'll do it for free. What good is the unblocked phone to me if I already have one, frenchies? Come on!